The Wake-Up Call About Dying

Dezra Nauls 0:00

If you don't have surgery tomorrow, you're gonna die. And I said, I don't want to die. I was addicted to food. I was living to eat and not eating to live. Don't let me be 400 pounds. So I was 397.3, 397.8. The bottom line is this: do you want to live? Do you want to live to see it? And you fill in the blank to what it is. Do you want to, do you, do you want to walk your daughter down the aisle? Do you want to see your son graduate? Do you want to get old with your wife? So you got to decide whether you want to live to see that. And so if you don't get yourself together, you're not going to be here, brother.

Grantley Martelly 0:33

This is the Real Health Black Men podcast, where we empower men to take control of your health. We provide vital information and build community support. So join us as we discuss everything from major health challenges to mental wellness and physical fitness. So if you're ready to level up your health and your life, you're in the right place. Let's get started.

Meet Dezra And Define Real Health

Grantley Martelly 0:55

Welcome to Real Health Black Men. Today my guest is my friend Dezra Nauls. I'm excited about our story that he we're going to share today. He's going to share his health journey. Dezra and I met a few years ago, and I'm really impressed by him. He describes himself as a foodie and a former big guy who is now taking care of his health. So we're going to hear that story. We're going to hear that journey and we're going to be encouraged. So, Dezra, welcome to Real Health Black Men.

Dezra Nauls 1:21

Thank you, Grantley. I really appreciate you inviting me. And uh I'm thankful that uh went on the health journey so that I could come on, I could have something to talk about Real Health Black Men.

Grantley Martelly 1:33

Well, we all have a story, but yeah, but thank you for being here. So introduce yourself, tell us a little bit about where you're from, a little bit about your family, and then just ground us in so we can get started.

Dezra Nauls 1:44

Well, I'm um I'm a newly minted 50-year-old African American male.

Grantley Martelly 1:50

So let's go to the club.

Dezra Nauls 1:52

Thank you. Just turned 50 here recently. I'm originally from Houston, Texas, uh, from the South. And um, as you guys all know, uh where I'm from where all the good food is. Uh there on the Gulf Coast. So all that good fried seafood and all that stuff that's bad for you. Um I'm a self-described foodie. And when I say I'm a foodie, I know there are levels to foodie. Being a foodie, some people are foodies in their local communities. Uh, I'm not that kind of foodie. I was the kind of foodie that would get on a plane just to go and eat. So I'm a different level of foodie. I take being a foodie very seriously.

Grantley Martelly 2:24

But thanks for that introduction. We're gonna get into that um more some more. So let me ask you this question. What does health mean to you beyond just typical measures like blood pressure and losing weight? What does it mean when you say I want to be healthy, which I assume is part of the reason why you went on this journey? What does it mean to you today?

Dezra Nauls 2:43

It means um health, wellness, my vitality, um, being mobile, uh, being able to um see my younger cousins and my nieces and nephews, see them grow up, being able to grow older, you know, with my my sibling, um, being able to see my mom grow older, you know, um, and the rest of my family. So to me it means health vitality, it means being able to get up and go, um, not being winded, uh, being able to to walk from the car to the building and um not have to stop and take a break. Um that's that's what this wellness journey has meant to me. Okay.

Grantley Martelly 3:21

So when you were younger, what was one of the common myths or things that you heard growing up in your community or your household that you had to unlearn as you got older, as you started this health journey?

Dezra Nauls 3:32

That you could just eat and eat and eat and eat and eat and eat with no repercussions. Um, I didn't grow up in a household where, you know, we were told watch what you eat, uh, and those kinds of things, or, you know, don't eat so much fried food. I didn't grow up in a household like that. And that's no, that's no dig on my mom and my grandmother, but that we just we we were in the South, so we we we ate good. Every meal was a banging meal. We never ate foolishness. Uh we made every meal count. You know, it was meat, protein, starch, carbs, everything. And a piece of corn bread. Every every meal. Was your grandma a good cook? No, she's she was an amazing cook. She's she's still with us, but she doesn't cook anymore. But she's an amazing cook. She had the type of Sunday dinner that the pastor would come and eat. Anybody that's that's in the African-American community and familiar with the church knows that anywhere that the preacher will eat is good food.

Grantley Martelly 4:25

Yeah.

Growing Up Big And Using Comedy

Grantley Martelly 4:26

So when did you first come become aware of your of this the struggle with your weight and this that it became truly apparent to you that you were becoming overweight?

Dezra Nauls 4:39

It was the summer going from the sixth grade to the seventh grade. So I've I've been a big boy since seventh grade. That school year, I noticed people at school started calling me chunky. That was the first word they used. You're a little chunky. Um, and then going from seventh grade to eighth grade, my mom mentioned that I could no longer buy my school clothes in the regular boys section, that she had to buy me husky clothes. So I went from being chunky to husky. Then going from the eighth grade to the ninth grade, I was just fat at that point. Then it went from chunky to husky to fat, you know. Um, and so, you know, people, people would make comments about my weight in high school, of course, you know, kids being kids, people would make comments about my my weight. Um, but by that time, you know, going through middle school with it, I was immune to those comments, you know. And uh I was somewhat of a comedian, so I knew how to bounce those jokes off of me and and turn it in turn that person into a joke. So yeah, so it was middle school going into high school, I realized I had a problem.

Grantley Martelly 5:39

So did it have any effect on you mentally or emotionally, people calling you those names and stuff?

Dezra Nauls 5:43

Um I'm sure it did, but I dealt with it with comedy. I my response was always comedy. So uh I was pretty good at playing the dozens. So, you know, you can talk about my weight, but you know, when I start talking about your mama, it's over with. So that was my defense mechanism.

Grantley Martelly 6:02

Did you play any sports in high school?

Dezra Nauls 6:03

Uh no, I did not. I did not. The last time I played sports was third grade.

Grantley Martelly 6:08

Third grade, okay. So you you became you became aware that you were overweight. Uh, what age that you became or you became aware of it that you felt like you needed to do something about it.

Dezra Nauls 6:21

My early 20s. My early 20s. Um, but I didn't I didn't I didn't take it seriously. I just, you know, just ate, ate, I ate and ate and ate and ate. I would I would lose a little weight, gain a little weight, lose a little weight, gain a little weight. Until I got in my 30s and it just it was out of control at that point. I think I think in my 30s, I was um, I think I was like 30, 31, was my first time being 300 pounds.

Grantley Martelly 6:45

Or is that at that thing where you're still traveling around just to eat?

Food Addiction And Failed Fixes

Grantley Martelly 6:49

I mean, going to see different cities just to eat and have dinner and stuff?

Dezra Nauls 6:52

That's about when I could start to afford it then. Uh when I got in my 30s, I could actually afford to, you know, buy a plane ticket and just to go somewhere and eat. So my 30s and 40s, that's what I spend my 30s and 40s doing. Going everywhere and eating. You open it up, if they opened up a new restaurant in Atlanta, I'd be there. Bellagio got a good buffet in Las Vegas, I was there.

Grantley Martelly 7:11

So you you would you say that you had an affinity for food, or would you say you had an addiction for food?

Dezra Nauls 7:18

I it was an addiction, I was addicted to food. I I like to say it this way. I was I was living to eat and not eating to live.

Grantley Martelly 7:27

And from your experience, would you say the addiction to food is similar to other addictions we heard about, or is that a term that you coined yourself or that an actual addiction?

Dezra Nauls 7:38

It's absolutely the same. Now that I've gone through it, I can tell you, and I've never been addicted to drugs, I've never been addicted to alcohol or anything like that, gambling, I've never been addicted to any of that. However, I have been addicted to food, and I I'm I'm willing to say now that I have broken the addiction to it, I can tell you that it is like likened to being addicted to anything else.

Grantley Martelly 7:59

So were these like cravings or stuff that you couldn't I mean, explain it to our listeners what it what it feels like to be addicted to food.

Dezra Nauls 8:07

It's a craving. It's it's you're you crave sugar. Uh it could be similar to a person being addicted to uh caffeine. Uh, you know, no shade to Starbucks, but you know, somebody that's I I gotta have my Starbeys. I gotta have my Starbucks. You that's an addiction. You're addicted to that. Uh your body is craving that. Um you know, when we were growing up, my mom would say it this way you you you're eating just because you know it's in there. Uh you're eating just because you know you got food in there. You're not hungry. You're just eating because you you know it's in there. You're eating a bowl of cereal because you know we got cereal in there, you know? And so that's what it was. I was eating ice cream just because it was ice cream in there, and I would just keep buying it. And eating and eating and eating and eating. And um part of that addiction again was was sugar. I was addicted to sugar. Uh, caffeinated drinks, uh, carbonated drinks, Dr. Pepper. To me, previously, there was nothing, nothing in this world better than an ice cold Dr. Pepper.

Grantley Martelly 9:02

Wow. So at some point you you said you became aware and you chose to go the bariatric route. But before you got to that point, were there any other things that you tried? There are many people out there, you know, pushing that you can try this and try that and try this. What other things did you try before you get to this point?

Dezra Nauls 9:20

And I'm not knocking anybody else's journey, but I tried the Atkins diet. I tried Jenny Craig, I tried Weight Watchers, I tried uh um what are those things where you you you you don't eat for for 12 hours? Like fasting. Yeah. Intermittent fasting, that's what it is. I tried that. I tried starving myself. I tried drinking water. I tried I even tried the biblical diets, you know, that they said the Daniel fast and all of those things, you know. And some of that stuff works for a look for a little while, but it's it's it's it's not sustainable.

Grantley Martelly 9:53

So some people say just go to the gym and exercise and and you would be okay. Did you try going to the gym?

Dezra Nauls 10:00

I did. Yeah, and you can try that, but then the the here's the trick with the gym. It's all good and well to say, go join the gym, but you st you gotta have this right because you can go to the gym every day. You can go to the gym every day and stay, you can live there. If your mind ain't right and you you you eating up, uh, as my mom would say, if you're eating up hell and drank in the Jordan Dry after you leave the gym, what's the point? You're not gonna lose anything.

Grantley Martelly 10:22

So if you don't change other things in your in your life and in your habits, then going to the gym is is just a temporary relief.

Dezra Nauls 10:30

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And

Bariatric Prep And Changing The Mind

Dezra Nauls 10:32

that's one of the things that I've learned on this journey is I had to get this right. That's why through the bariatric process, in order for me to even qualify for bariatric surgery, I had to go through a series of uh psychology appointments. That's where I learned a lot about food, and I had to, I had to meet regularly with a dietitian who taught me about food, taught me about what I was eating, taught me to look at ingredients, and taught me, taught me the difference between sugar, natural sugar, and added sugar. Uh, taught me to look at the protein content in a meal. Um, taught me, you know, how addictive sugar was, and that, you know, you're gonna have to give it up. And so that that that's how I know now, you know, what works. And it's interesting because now when I go to the grocery store, I I noticed that I spend a lot longer in the grocery store because I'm I'm standing in the aisle looking at, I'm reading labels now. And if it has ingredients on there that I don't know what it is, I don't buy it.

Grantley Martelly 11:23

So before you were just going to the grocery store picking it up, and if you wanted it look good, you just took it, but now you actually pay attention to what it says. Yeah.

Dezra Nauls 11:31

Yeah, I'm look I'm looking at the I'm looking at the added sugar. I pay attention to natural sugars. You know, natural sugars are are are not that bad for you, but it's that added sugar that gets you when they have to add sugar to it to make it edible, I don't want it.

Grantley Martelly 11:43

So you said you had to go through this qualifying process. It was just, it would you just didn't say, Well, I want to have this surgery and you've been a foundation surgeon and scheduled a date. There was actually a uh qualification process that you had to go through.

Dezra Nauls 11:55

Yeah, that and part of it is the insurance requires it. You know, when you want the insurance to pay for it. Now, I've had friends that that pay cash money and they wouldn't have theirs. Now, as you pay cash, you don't have to go through this process. You just find your surgeon and you get on the table. But because I wanted the insurance to pay for it, there's a process, there's a qualification process that you have to go through. First of all, your your your insurance has to have a bariatric policy. And that's part of the reason why I I wanted this surgery. I started wanting this surgery in my early, late 30s, early 40s is when I really wanted it. And um, my previous employer didn't have a bariatric policy, they wouldn't pay for it. Um, even if my life depended on it, they wouldn't pay for it. So um, lucky for me, uh I received another opportunity at another company. And a part of me, even taking that job, was I did some research on the company and their insurance that they offered, and they had a bariatric policy. And that's one of the reasons that I took the job was because I knew at some point after I was there a certain amount of time, I could go and have, you know, if I build up my time off, I could go and have the surgery. So I um went through that process.

Grantley Martelly 13:00

So would you say that the process was valuable, that the what you learned in the process leading up to it, do you count that as being valuable or that you were just checking boxes?

Dezra Nauls 13:10

No, no. I I would say if I'm being 100% honest, probably my first and my second appointment was checking a box. But then after I started reading and doing research, you know, because they send you through classes and you have to read materials and they test you on it. And so I started, you know, reading and you know, it it started getting interesting to me. And I learned a lot about myself, and I learned a lot about my addictions, and I learned a lot about, you know, why why am I gravitating to this food? And, you know, why why do I have this understanding of how food works? And, you know, you know, how did I learn this? And and so once I realized that, and my dietitian told me one day, she said, when you realize that you're gonna have to break up with food, your relationship with food is gonna be forever changed. When you get to that point, that's when it'll really click.

Grantley Martelly 13:52

So you you sound to me like you were learning it was not just a physical change you had to go through, you had to go through like a mental change, mental and emotional.

Dezra Nauls 14:00

It's it's it's physical, it's mental, it's emotional, and it's spiritual. You know, because there was a there was a bunch of days I had to say, Lord, you're gonna have to help me. You know, I had to, there were several days I had to remind him what he said to me. I had to remind him, tell him what he said. You said that you would never leave me nor forsake me. And so I'm in this situation, I need to lose this weight. You're gonna have to help me. And if you don't help me, I'm not gonna be successful. And so I I it's a strange prayer to pray, but I prayed to the Lord. I said, Lord, don't ever let me be 400 pounds. That was my prayer. And I know somebody out there saying, What? You prayed to God? Yes. I'm talking about this, this is the relationship that we and him have. So I told him, just whatever you do, don't let me be 400 pounds. And so I was always, you know, he has a sense of humor. So I was 397.3, 397.8. But thank God I was never I never was 400 pounds.

Grantley Martelly 14:57

Never hit the number, right? He kept his promise.

Dezra Nauls 14:59

Uh the the the effectual fervent prayers of a righteous man avails much.

Grantley Martelly 15:04

Yeah.

Dezra Nauls 15:04

So I was never 400 pounds.

Grantley Martelly 15:36

So let's let's talk now about you you decide this, you're going through the pre-qualification, uh, the day is set. And um what take us from there into the process and then the recovery?

Dezra Nauls 15:50

So so it's important to note that prior to the surgery I had, I had never been hospitalized ever in my life. And so, of course, I've been to urgent care, been to the emergency room, but I've never had to be hospitalized. So this is my first time being hospitalized. Um, and so that was an interesting journey. So, uh, and that's gonna be important in a moment. So get there a day of the surgery. And

Surgery Night Fear And Faith

Dezra Nauls 16:12

what my my mom flew in to be there for my surgery, of course, because she said she didn't want me to have surgery without her being there. So my mom flew in that day. I sat my mom down. We went and had dinner, uh, downtown Seattle. And um, at dinner I told her, I said, hey mom, we need to have a talk. And so she's like, okay, yeah, what's up? I said, okay, so if something goes wrong tomorrow, uh, here's what I need for you to do. And of course, you know, she didn't want to talk about that. Oh, we don't need to talk about that. I was like, no, no, no. We do need to talk about it. If something goes wrong tomorrow, here's what I need for you to do. Here's who I need for you to ask to be on the program. I've already talked to them. They know what they're supposed to do. I don't want to know who's gonna be on your funeral program. Who, who, who knows who's gonna be on their funeral program? Like, what are you talking about? I'm like, I know who I want to be on my funeral because I don't want you to pick the wrong people. And you know, and they and they get up there talking foolishness. She's like, well, you ain't you ain't gonna know it, you ain't gonna be there, so I am gonna be there, and I will know if my wishes were not, you know, on it. Anyway, um, so we had that discussion. And then that night when I laid down, the night prior to my surgery, all these thoughts wandered through my head. And I had just decided that night, I said, you know what, I'm not gonna do it. I had gone through it's been a whole year, right? I'm going through this process. And I just decided the night before my surgery, I was before I was due at the hospital. I just decided I'm not gonna do it. And mind you, I got all these thoughts. What if you don't, what if, what if, what if that's what's in my head. What if, what if you, what if, what if, what if you know? I'm hearing all these voices. What if it's my voice, but I'm just like, it's my voice like echoing. What if what if there's what if you, what if, what if what in my head, right? And I'm saying, I'm just not gonna do it. Forget it. I'm just not gonna do it. I'm like, my mom's gonna be upset, but I'm not gonna do it. And right when I said that, all the voices in my head stopped. And I heard his voice. And his voice said to me, if you don't have surgery tomorrow, just as plain as I'm saying it to you is how I was said to me. If you don't have surgery tomorrow, you're gonna die. And I stopped. And I said, I said, So you saying you're gonna kill me? Like, no. If you don't do this, there's something down the road. I can't tell you what it is, but there's something coming that if you don't get yourself together, I ain't gonna be, I I you you're gonna go. And I said, I don't wanna die. He said, Well, you better get on that table. Wow. And so I decided I'm I'm gonna do it. And went to the hospital that next morning and had the surgery. Now, had the surgery, and then following my surgery, I had complications. And for the first time in my life, I was hospitalized. I I I think I talked to you during that time. And I'm thankful for you that, you know, you prayed for me and helped me to get through that. Um, but I would I ended up being hospitalized because I um I was vitamin deficient. Out of my own ignorance, it was my fault. I was vitamin deficient, wound up in the hospital. And so, again, that was my first time being hospitalized. And I ended up being hospitalized several times after that for that vitamin deficiency until I could get myself back together, until I could get, you know, my health back. Because when you have the bariatric surgery, you because of the surgery

Complications From Vitamin Deficiency

Dezra Nauls 18:57

that you have, you lose so many nutrients. You know, you you lose so much. And so you have to take vitamins. You have to take, you know, you have to take these vitamins, you have to take these supplements in order to sustain yourself.

Grantley Martelly 19:07

And so you start taking them before, before the surgery or after the surgery?

Dezra Nauls 19:10

No, you have to take them, you start taking them like a week after the surgery. But I I misunderstood the instructions from the doctor. So, you know, when you're leaving the hospital, they give you pain medicine and they give you certain type of medicines. You have to take this for like a week, and then you stop taking that and then you start taking the vitamins. Well, I misunderstood that because, you know, I'm hours after the surgery and they, you know, barking all these instructions at you, and I'm just like, okay, yeah, yeah, all right, I got it, I got it, I got it, okay. Yeah, when can I go home? You know, and so I missed the instruction. And so I was I I didn't start taking my vitamins until um three weeks after my surgery, which was to my detriment. Because by so by that time I'm already vitamin deficient.

Grantley Martelly 19:45

And my body is is in essence, my body is shutting down. Body's healing from the surgery, but you're not feeding the vitamins, so it's not, it's not getting enough.

Dezra Nauls 19:54

Yeah, and you're you're healing, so you know, you're on a liquid diet, and you know, so you're not you're not eating anything. So, you know, you're on a liquid diet, you can only drink protein water, and then you get to the next point, you can have the the protein drinks. And and I and I and I don't want this to discourage anybody from from doing this. Your journey is going to be your journey, but I'm just explaining to everybody that this was my journey. I didn't listen. So when you go and you do it, make sure that you're very clear on what your instructions from your surgeon is. I was not clear.

Grantley Martelly 20:22

Or have somebody or have somebody in the room with you to Yes.

Dezra Nauls 20:25

Yes, because I missed those instructions. And so I I I I was two weeks behind. And so my body went into, went into a mode where um my potassium got low. Um, and as a result of my potassium getting low, I lost feelings in my legs, my vision, I started to lose my vision, and I was um nauseous. So I was, you know, spent spent the entire day, you know, nauseous all day long. And so of course you had to go back into the hospital then? Did several trips to the emergency room. I was hospitalized every time. And you know, they they'll they'll charge you back up, put the IV in you, get you back, you know. But that last time I went in the hospital, I was there for, I think I was there for seven days. Uh, because that was when my vision started going. And so me and me and the Lord had to have another conversation. I was like, okay, now hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, big guy. Um I can't I can't have you taking my vision from me now. You know, I need you to get my get my vision back. And um, you know, the Lord has always been so I I I I don't know why he loves me as much as he does, but he but he does. And um I prayed that prayer at 7 a.m. laying in the hospital bed, and my doctor told me that um, she said, we're gonna we're gonna put the nutrients back in you. And she said, your vision may come back uh in about a week. And um she said, but the dangerous part is it may not. It may may you may have lost it permanently. And um I thought to myself, I was like, you obviously don't know the God I serve. So I may thought they he ain't gonna let the he ain't gonna let me go out like that. So you were you were is it just blurred or was it completely gone? It was blurred. Blurred. You know, no matter how much I squinted, I couldn't see anything. With my glasses on, I couldn't see a thing. With glasses on, my vision was blurred. Take the glasses off, they it was just as blurred.

Grantley Martelly 22:08

So the glasses you can just see shadows. Yeah. Yeah, just see shadows. Okay, yeah.

Dezra Nauls 22:14

So I prayed that prayer laying on my bed, laying on my back in the hospital bed at seven. By noon, I was in I was laying in the bed text and had my I was had it back, came back to me.

Grantley Martelly 22:22

Wow, man, that's good, good testimony. So overall, how long did your journey take? How long did your recovery take? Four months before I back to myself.

Dezra Nauls 23:46

When I can start reintroducing myself to food, it got easy then. Because now I can I can eat, you know, protein. I can eat chicken. I can eat, you know, a little steak. You know, I can, you can, you start figuring out what you can eat again. You can start figuring out what foods can, you know, what can I eat? What do I like? What do I no longer like? Um, that's been an interesting thing. It's like before surgery, I could eat Wingstop. Now it makes me sick to my stomach to even smell it. Sorry, Wingstop, if y'all are listening.

Grantley Martelly 24:10

So you just you guys, you realize some stuff changed, some things. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Dezra Nauls 24:20

Metabolically come I'm completely different. I mean, I've been to the doctor several times since my surgery. That's one of the things about the surgery after surgery. You have to go to the doctor several times. And my um, I'm thank god my charts are amazing. Um before I had the surgery, I was uh pre-diabetic, and now uh my uh glucose is still and I'm no longer pre-diabetic.

Grantley Martelly 24:43

No longer pre-diabetic. That is great. That's another victory right there, because that has its own set of challenges that comes along with being diabetic. So tell us a c a few of the changes that you've made since the surgery and since your recovery.

Dezra Nauls 24:58

Protein, protein, protein. I focus on the protein. Protein, protein, protein. So now every morning for breakfast I have a protein shake. I start my morning with uh 30 grams of protein. Uh I try to get at least 80 grams of protein a day. Uh minimum, minimum of 64 ounces of water a day. Um I'm exercising now, I have a gym membership. Um so now I'm I'm I'm mixing the gym with diet. So, you know, it's now it's work. I got this together, and so now the gym makes sense. Yeah.

Grantley Martelly 25:27

So yeah, you got you got the mental part of it together. So tell us what I what I looks like to you today.

Dezra Nauls 25:33

Um I'm not fooled by food anymore. It doesn't, you can't you can't fool me with the food anymore. Like I said, I'm reading ingredients.

Recovery Wins And New Food Rules

Dezra Nauls 25:39

I'm I'm looking to see what's in food. Uh I can't by naturally now, because of the size of my stomach now, I can only eat four ounces. I have a little four ounce, four ounce pounds.

Grantley Martelly 25:49

Okay.

Dezra Nauls 25:50

Yeah, so my stomach is much smaller than the average human. So that's by design. That's by design of the surgery. That's what helps you to rapidly lose the weight, because you keep you can't eat a lot. So I'm I'm I'm consistently operating in a calorie deficit.

Grantley Martelly 26:01

So you were 397 when you went in. What's your weight right now? I'm 115 down, so I'm right at about 281. Okay, congratulations. That's a big change. Big change. And that's that's in less than a year, right? Is that correct? Yeah, yeah.

Dezra Nauls 26:16

September will make a year. So I'm right at about uh 10 months.

Grantley Martelly 26:20

Congratulations.

Dezra Nauls 26:20

And I haven't been 283 pounds since I was in my late 20s.

Grantley Martelly 26:24

But that's a good change. Uh, do you do you feel good? I mean, do you feel like it was worth it?

Dezra Nauls 26:29

I feel amazing. I feel amazing I I feel literally and figuratively like a weight has been lifted. So I imagine that 100 pounds, that's like me walking around with five, 20-pound bags of sugar every day.

Grantley Martelly 26:38

Yeah. You lost like a person.

Dezra Nauls 26:40

I did.

Grantley Martelly 26:41

Congratulations.

Dezra Nauls 26:42

So I'm I look better, I feel better. Um, you know, smaller clothes. I went from a six, I was a 5x, 6x shirt. Now I'm in a 2x. Yeah, that's a good one. I was uh my waist, I was a 62, some pants, I was a 64, 62, 64 in the pants and the waist. And um now I'm a 48. My goal is to get to a get to a 3840. That's that's a good size for me. So I'm I'm I'm almost there.

Grantley Martelly 27:08

How tall are you, just to put it in context for people?

Dezra Nauls 27:11

Five seven.

Grantley Martelly 27:12

Five seven, okay.

Dezra Nauls 27:13

Yeah. So prior to prior to the surgery, I was a little tea teapot, short and stout.

Grantley Martelly 27:22

In the in the in the black community, we we hear many people say uh that sometimes they go to the doctor. The few times they go to the doctor, they feel unseen or unheard or dismissed. Like if they're not taken seriously. Have you ever had that experience?

Dezra Nauls 27:39

Thank thankfully, no. Um when I was in Houston, I had a um, I purposefully, purposefully sought out a African-American doctor. And uh I had the same doctor for like the last 10 years when I was in Houston. Uh Dr. Tosha Tosha Vincent was my doctor. And um she she always made me feel seen, always made me feel heard, was consistently on me about my weight. Um, you know, she did, to her credit, she did have me paying attention to my numbers, you know, so I would watch my numbers, even if it was no more than to get it, get it right before I went to go see her, you know, for my annual. Uh that's another thing, you know, go get your annual physical. Um, you know, go get checked out. I mean, so I always felt seen, I always feel hurt. But but I but I was intentional about who my care provider was. And so I would tell you, if you can, you need to be very intentional about who your your care provider is. Uh I would say if you can, audition doctors. I would audition them. You know, I went through a few before I got to Dr. Benson. I I I fired quite a few before I got to her.

Grantley Martelly 28:40

Yeah, audition your doctor, that that is a good thing. Absolutely. A good thing. Because some people feel as though they can't question their doctors or they absolutely like they want to they don't want to change because the doctor's feeling is gonna be hurt. But you're saying you're saying your relationship with your doctor is as important as your health.

Dezra Nauls 28:58

It absolutely is. It it's it's it could be detrimental to your health. You absolutely can audition them, you absolutely can question them because at the end of the day they're practicing medicine. And it's your health.

Grantley Martelly 29:08

And it's your health.

Dezra Nauls 29:09

That's right.

Grantley Martelly 29:10

You're the one suffering from if there's gonna be anything happening, you you're the one who's gonna have to be able to do that.

Dezra Nauls 29:14

You absolutely can question them wanting to put you on medication and want to why? What does that do? What would what will

Finding A Doctor Who Listens

Dezra Nauls 29:19

that do? What's you know, what's in it?

Grantley Martelly 29:21

Well, yeah, I mean those those are good questions to ask. And and I encourage people that when you go to your doctor, have a list of questions written down. Don't think you're gonna remember them all because sometimes when you walk into the room, you know, you you you forget, but have them written down so you can ask and get your questions answered.

Dezra Nauls 29:39

Now, and and that and that's a good use of Chat GPT and Cloud and all that. That's a good use of that to get to form help you formulate some questions to ask your doctor. You know, that that now that's a good use of AI. Um So that you can go in there armed with information to questions that you can ask, you know.

Grantley Martelly 29:53

Why do you think why do you think there's hesitancy among our brothers in our communities to want to go to the doctor?

Dezra Nauls 30:02

Well, we're hard headed, man. We hardheaded. No pun intended, but we don't believe fat meat is greasy. No, we that that that's the bottom line. And I can tell you I can tell us that brothers, because I'm one of us, hardheaded. You know, we don't want to listen until it's too late.

Grantley Martelly 30:13

And how how do we help how do we help our brothers overcome that? Overcome that resistance and overcome that stubbornness.

Dezra Nauls 30:20

The bottom line is this: do you want to live? Do you want to live to see it? And you fill in the blank to what it is. Do you want to, do you, do you want to walk your daughter down the aisle? Do you want to see your son graduate? Do you want to get old with your wife? So you got to decide whether you want to live to see that. And so if you don't get yourself together, you're not gonna be here, brother. That's that's as plain as it is. I mean, I I'm I'm always gonna tell you like a TI is.

Grantley Martelly 30:43

Yeah.

Dezra Nauls 30:44

And I'm I'm I'm talking from experience. And that this is these are the things I had to say. You know, I'm I'm I'm I've been working all of these years, and I, you know, I've been, you know, you you work toward retirement, but it's like you you do all that and you don't even live to see it.

Grantley Martelly 30:57

Don't even live to see it. Yeah, leave it to somebody else. So having a good health support system around us is proven to be good for us, not only physically, but mentally and emotionally and psychologically, strengthen us. Um, who do you have in your health support system that helps you stay strong, feel energized, and be encouraged? Because you've you've been through a long journey and a tough journey. And like you said, you even had complications in that journey, but now you're on the other side and you feel great. You've lost 115 pounds. So tell us a little bit about your support system that you have around you.

Dezra Nauls 31:33

First and foremost, um my relationship with God. That's that's first and foremost. That's the joy and the strength of my life right there. I can tell you that much. And I would not, I would not have been able to do it without his grace and his mercy. So I give all the honor to him. Second, uh, would be I'm thankful to still have my

Do You Want To Live To See It

Dezra Nauls 31:51

mom. Um, you know, always right here about my getting myself together, going to the doctor, you know, uh, eating right, did you exercise today, what you ate, you know, did you drink some water, you know? So she's always been there. Um and my sister uh has always been there. You know, she's just like a mama, right here, just spending in your ear. Yeah, hey, have you done this? Hey, what you doing? You know, you look, you know, and I'm thankful for my grandmother. You know, every time I go and see my grandmother, she's like, ooh, you look like you're gaining weight, you know. And uh it's funny at the time, but you know, it's a little subtle reminder that, you know, ooh, you know, every time she sees me, she says that I need to get myself together. Yeah, she was telling you in a subtle way. Yeah, in a subtle way, you know. Um, and then to to go and see her now and for her to say, You just, you just you just drifting away.

Grantley Martelly 32:42

Yeah. They notice it when you're going up or they notice it when you're coming down, right? Yeah.

Dezra Nauls 32:48

Yeah. So you it it went from you just get every time you every time I see you, you're getting bigger and bigger. And then now she's saying, Oh, you just you're just dwindling away.

Grantley Martelly 32:57

Yeah. I'll take it. I'll take it. That's good. That's good. You take it. Yeah, it's a it's it's a it's a compliment. So what are some other things you may want to share with our listeners that you've learned in this health journey and in life, that as you now at this phase of life said you just turned 50, you've just been through a major health challenge, you made some adjustments to your life. So, what are some other things you may want to share with our listeners that you think are important?

Dezra Nauls 33:20

One of the things I've learned through this journey is um I've learned to love myself again. You know, I've always been pretty high on myself. Um I've never struggled with self-esteem. And so this surgery or this weight loss process didn't give me my self-esteem back. Even as a big guy, you know, I've always had great self-esteem. Felt pretty good about myself. Sometimes to my detriment, because, you know, had I really been conscious of what was happening to me, I would have stopped eating a long time ago. But I just kept eating, I kept eating, you know, as long as I could buy the clothes. I always dressed nice, was able to put, you know, nice clothes on and stuff like that. So I never struggled with that. But I learned to love myself again, you know, and I'm loving myself in a different way now. I'm I'm loving a new me. And so I would tell the listeners to um, I would, I would actually dare them to to dig into your relationship with food. Really look at what you're eating, you know, really looking at where you look at where you're eating at. Uh look at the ingredients that are in your food. Um even stuff that says uh organic. Pay attention to that stuff. Pay attention to what you're what you're consuming. And uh I would I would challenge you to understand your relationship with food and then act on what you learn.

Grantley Martelly 34:31

So I want to go back a little bit. You said you learn to love yourself again. What does it mean to love? What do you mean by love yourself?

Dezra Nauls 34:38

To love yourself is to take care of yourself. It's to want to see you healthy, want to see you happy. Um and I wake up now, I wake up in the morning with a new determination. What will I discover today? Uh I only weigh myself once a week. Um, and so, you know, every Monday, of course, every Sunday going into every Monday, it's like, all right, well, so I weighed this week. And so I've been I've been humbled the last few weeks because I've kind of gotten to like a plateau. And you usually get to a plateau about uh month eight or nine after surgery. And so I'm at my I'm at my plateau. So I I was at 114 pounds lost for quite some time. And then uh this past Monday it went down another pound, so I lost a pound. Um, and so now I'm I'm exercising and and increasing my protein to jumpstart my weight loss again.

Grantley Martelly 35:24

So in wrapping up, uh there if there's a guy out there listening to this right now who is in a similar situation, you know, he's overweight, he he's not feeling good about himself, and he's just like, I've tried everything, I've done everything they said to do, I've spent all this money on that stuff, diet, exercise, going to the gym, and their self-esteem is just broken and they feel hopeless. What words of hope would you offer to him and encouragement?

Dezra Nauls 35:52

If you're still breathing, there's hope. Um if you have the will, there's hope. First and foremost, I would tell that brother to make sure you go to the doctor. Know your numbers. Know where your blood pressure is, know where your glucose is, know you know your sugar and you know all that stuff. You you need to know your numbers because you need to know what your baseline is. Um and if you are if you have insurance and your insurance has the ability to for you to have bariatric, you can go and talk to a bariatric doctor. It doesn't mean you're gonna end up having surgery. There are there are there are non-surgical options out there. Um I just chose surgery because of where I was. You know, I I was past those non-surgical options. My required surgery. So if you can go to see a bariatric specialist, I would I would encourage you to do that. Um and they'll tell you what your options are based on your where you are in your health journey.

Grantley Martelly 36:40

Yeah, you know, one of the things that I've learned in this journey with this podcast and my health journey is um two things. You said one of them, one of them is know your numbers. And the other one that I've come up with is without good information, it's difficult to make good decisions. So a lot of times we need to go to the doctor, not just not like you said that you're gonna go and have surgery or next month, but you need the information, you need to know your numbers, you need to know all of those things. You need to have information and have conversations so that you can make a decision.

Dezra Nauls 37:12

Yes.

Grantley Martelly 37:13

And the fear the fear that we have of going to the doctor many times prevents us from having the knowledge to make a decision. Yes. So then we wait till we have a crisis. Yeah you know, and I jokingly say we wait till we're bending over and peeing to then want to make a decision. But by that time, the decision is now made for us because it's a crisis. Yeah. So, so guys, know your numbers and remember that you need information to make good decisions. And it doesn't mean you're gonna make it tomorrow, but you gotta have it so that when the time comes, you can make the right decision.

Dezra Nauls 37:49

And at least go in time so that you can have options.

Grantley Martelly 37:51

Yes. The sooner you go, the more options you have. Yes. So, Dezra, I really want to thank you for sharing your story, and I really want to thank you for being open and vulnerable with our listeners. If somebody wants to get in touch with you, what contact information could I share with them?

Dezra Nauls 38:06

You can share my they can follow me on Instagram. I'm on Instagram. I am Dezra. My name is spelled D-E-Z-R-A. So I am Dezra on Instagram. Uh, they're welcome to reach out to me. And uh if I can help you, if I can encourage you, if I can provide you with any information, um, you can hit me up on Instagram and um I'll be there for you.

Grantley Martelly 38:25

Well, thank you very much. I look forward to seeing you sometime soon. Let's let's uh make plans to have coffee sometime so I can get to see you and take a picture with your new self. Let's do it. Thank you for being my friend and thank you for giving me the time tonight. Absolutely. Thank you for inviting me. I really appreciate you and uh thank you for all the encouragement over the years. Well, I'm here for you, brother. Write to us at realhealthblackmen@ gmail.com. Real Health Blackmen at gmail.com. To support this podcast, go to buymeacoffee.com forward slash Real Health Blackmen. Buymeacoffee.com Real Health Blackmen. And to become a corporate sponsor, send us an email.